Spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch

by Mark Ward January 11, 2017

Spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch

As a somewhat light hearted article this time around, I’m musing on the pop culture phrase made relevant in jokes and movies, “spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch.” This, of course, has reference to how one makes the Catholic “cross” sign, usually after some harrowing experience and the person is thanking God for their safe emergence.  
The “Sign of the Cross” is also more than that, and not something to mock.

If we look at each of these moves, and even the placement on a persons body, it harkens back to the the day when men wore more formal clothing most of the time.  The “spectacles" refer to their place at the eyes since this was way before contacts or lasik. If you had a problem seeing clearly, then you had to wear glasses.

Thank goodness that style or fashion hasn’t had a chance to displace a man’s testicles, but if we’re talking about castration, then culture has done a fine job of making men wussies and father’s some kind of bumbling idiot.  I’ll comment on that now.  I would posit that men, more so than any other time, have expanded their roles more than ever, to be better father’s, be present more in their children’s lives, and to participate more fully in the household with their wive's.  For some reason, the need our culture has to denigrate and nullify the divine position father’s play in the lives of their family and society, has taken a less than intelligent turn.  Granted, there are many men on the spectrum, from angels to assholes, but in the end, men are more emotionally intelligent, mindful and insightful than at any other time in history. 

On to the wallet.  The side-to-side motion of the cross in this sequence does in fact refer to the placement of the wallet.  Done properly, the movement goes left first, which would assume you carry your wallet on the left side, which most do not.  Since the dominant hand of most men by the numbers is right, most men carry their wallet in their right rear or front pocket.  I prefer the front pocket since it helps my lower back, is more convenient and helps discourage pick-pockets.  But I know many right-handers who carry their minimalist wallet in their left pocket, leaving their right pocket available for keys, money clip or phone.

Finally, we finish our move by referencing the watch.  But the watch is on your wrist you say? Well, in the day, they were pocket watches, kept in the small pocket on the suit vest, usually connected with a chain to ensure its safety in the event it fell out of pocket. And often enough they were used by the dominant hand.

There you have it.  Spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch.  Our specialty is the wallet portion of this and with the advance in men’s fashion, style, technology and preference, several of these things have changed.  Some for the worse, but most for the better.


Mark Ward
Mark Ward

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